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Chapter 3 I suffer from severe selective mutism
Lack of friends made me happy (1)
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If you find a child who have no friends, do you think he or she is happy or unhappy?
Most people will answer, "He or she is unhappy."
I can agree with that. Anxious child, especially, tend to feel lonely. But there's an exception.
[I felt pleasure in being alone]
My friendless state has continued for more than half a year. The last friend I made was M whom I got acquainted with in the previous school.
At first I felt lonely. I desired for friends.
But gradually, my feelings changed. I felt pleasure in being alone. I was satisfied with refusing friendship and spending my time with doing what I wanted. I never thought that being alone was fun!
I enjoyed solitude. Being alone gave me freedom. I thought my friendless state positively. That made my school life happy. You may think that I was an eccentric boy, though.
(To be continued)
Index of SM story
